Article from ST Recruit, Aug 22 2015

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ST Aug 22 2015

How to recover from job loss

Managing the emotions of those who have been outplaced in their jobs and had their main source of livelihood taken away from them can be a challenge.  Emotions experienced from such individuals include anger, non-acceptance as well as the loss of self-esteem.  If such emotions are not managed well, they could eventually lead to depression. Before this happens, it may be worth seeking the help of an outplacement coach. An outplacement coach works with clients to achieve one key objective – acceptance of the change in employment status. This is no easy task, as many employees have spent years, and sometimes the entire span of their careers, with the companies that outplaced them.

What is lost?
Putting things into perspective, you have just lost your job.  What remains intact are your qualifications, experience, achievements, network, etc. These provide you an opportunity to move forward to find your next employer, should you wish to.
As a consequence of losing your job, you may also realise that you have lost also some so-called friends.  This is a fact of life – some people be-friend you because of who you are in the corporate world.  When you lose your job, your usefulness (to them) is no longer there – and hence they move away.  Looking at things from the positive side of things, at least you now know who your true friends are.

Emotional support and Acceptance
Sharing the news with your family and loved ones is critical, do not attempt to shoulder the burden by yourself. Emotional support is just as important as practical support. 
As many of us spend more time at work than at home, losing your job involuntarily might be akin to losing a part of your life. Do acknowledge this fact and feel perfectly comfortable to take time off to grief your loss.  Cry if you have to, comforting yourself that it is just being a human being.

Managing anger
Be angry with your boss for not ‘protecting’ you. For all you know, your job loss might have resulted in a decision that your boss has taken – sometimes it is a valid reason e.g. business costs management and sometimes, well, it may be personal.
Businesses go through changes and restructuring all the time.  They have to do this to react to on-going and continuous changes in the business.  Many times, changes have to be put in-place for sheer business survival. 
The reality is that there is nothing you can do reverse the decision. Anger sucks energy out of you – it would be more productive for you to utilize your energy to do things that bring you forward, and creates your future.

Re-set your daily schedule
For many years, you have been used to a schedule that sees you waking up, and going to work. Many find the initial weeks after their last day of service difficult to manage because there is now a big gap in-between waking up and going to bed at night. 
It is important to find and put in-place a new daily regime. Identify  ‘replacement’ activities to fill your day.  Ideally, these activities should include spending time doing our job search, working on your Linked-In network, networking lunch, coffee catch-ups, and also some that will keep you healthy. Taking up new learnings, volunteering to help the needy, and improving your jogging time and golf handicap are also useful. Channel your energy into doing ‘feel-good’ activities that will propel you forward.
Staying positive-minded is the key that helps you un-lock the door to your future.

Try to enjoy the break
Ironical and patronizing as it might sound, adopting a mind-set that the break in employment is a positive one will be helpful. For many, the reality is that they have been working long hours, traveling on business, spend hours on tele-conferencing deep into the wee hours of the morning, that they have not had sufficient quality time with their family and loved ones.
I know of an outplaced HR professional who thoroughly enjoyed ferrying his children to and from school each day that he actually found it de-motivating to return to work when he secured an alternative job.  Another client took an entire year off to re-build his marriage – something that he neglected during his 18-year career with the European company that eventually outplaced him. The business rationale he was given – ‘role redundancy’. The real reason – ‘his boss found his existence in the company a threat to hers’.
 
Letting go of the past is the most effective strategy to enable the outplaced to move forward.  Many take it as a negative thing when it happens, but on hind-sight, equally many realized that it is a positive thing.  A job is a job and as we all know, a job these days can be an illusion – here now, and gone tomorrow. Losing your job does not mean it is the end of the world.  Sometimes, it can be the beginning of a better future for yourself, and your family.
 




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